When you first find out your pregnant everyone I know does two things. They test again to make sure and they figure out what the due date is. Sometimes if you’re really excited you’ll estimate about when you do the first ultra sound, then the gender. I mean guys we have whole parties dedicated to finding out what the gender is! We did a huge photo shoot even to find out what we were having.
Truthfully I was so certain we would have a girl first. I had fantasy’s about how I would decorate her room and what I would call her and what I would say about her. It didn’t help that we struggled for years..yes…years. To have a baby so when we found out we were pregnant I prayed that it was a girl. So when we popped the balloon and the confetti was blue I was sad. So I’m going to tell you what I found that made me see what a gift it was to not have what I wanted all along. Take a look below.
I realized that regardless of what I was having God gave me this child at this time because he knew this was the one I needed. Daxton was so much more of a gift than I ever could have imagined. He is sweet, and easy going and honestly he saved me from my darkest days. He didn’t sleep well but he was so easy going and I needed that when we moved two times before he was even 4 months old.
I remember my best friend telling me when I told her I was sad Dax was a boy she said, “it’s important for good women to raise the righteous boys to righteous men.”
I realized that I can have a girl that likes Tonka Trucks and building things just like I can have a tender boy who loves to cook.
Fake it til you make it. When people would ask me what I was having I would smile big and say ,”we are having a baby boy and I am so excited!” even when I was sad. Because here’s the thing; when you brood on it, you make it worse.
I understood that it was okay to be sad and disappointed; it didn’t make me a bad mom-to-be. I knew that my feelings would subside as the pregnancy continued; and it did.
If you’re in a house with all boys and you’re welcoming your next boy see this as a continuing opportunity to be the lady of the land. The one that gets all the sparkle and shine. Think about how to you can teach them to be respectful, and kind.
If you’re in a house with all girls and you’re welcoming your next girl think about all the tea parties, the dress up times, the nail painting. Think about how you will be able to teach your daughters to be strong, resilient, self reliant.
I thought about how it didn’t matter what I was getting I was still going to teach him to the best of my ability. In other words it didn’t matter if he was a boy or girl I was still going to teach him how to cook, mend his clothes, iron his shirts, etc. My job as a mom is to prepare my children to be good, self sustaining people for the real world. My job is not to tell them what they can or can’t be.
If you’re still upset about the gender. Take yourself away from the situation and ask yourself why, why are you so upset about not having the sex you want? For me when I really asked myself why I was sad the real reason was that I wanted something cute to dress up. I wanted to do the bows and the dresses. When I finally realized that I was ashamed. God sent me this perfect beautiful, healthy baby boy and I was mad that I couldn’t dress him up. Seriously?
I hope this helps. The biggest thing for me was having perspective on really I was upset about. I have learned now that regardless of what we will have next, each baby is a blessing and I am blessed to have a child I can love, nurture and teach.
Thanks for reading